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Friday, October 25, 2013

The Fucker Works In Mysterious Ways

I read about this yesterday, and it pissed me off to a point where I had to vent.  Sorry.

While vacationing at Crater of Diamonds State Park* in Arkansas, 14-year-old Tana Clymer found a yellow diamond, weighing 3.85 carats.  The diamond could be worth up to $60,000.


The State Park, a tourist attraction, allows visitors to keep any diamonds they find while on the grounds. Approximately 400 diamonds have been found in 2013 alone.  The largest diamond ever discovered within the United States, weighing a whopping 40.23 carats, was discovered at the site in 1924.

Naturally, Tana took time to think the individual that helped her find the diamond - God.
"I thought it was a piece of paper or foil from a candy wrapper," Tana said. "Then, when I touched it, I thought it was a marble. I think God pointed me to it. I was about to sprint to join my family, and God told me to slow down and look. Then, I found the diamond!"
She named the diamond "God's Jewel".  Earlier this year, a 12-year-old North Carolina boy named a 5.16 carat diamond he found there "God's Glory".  Being the good Christians this girl and her family are, they're donating the money they receive from the sale of "God's Jewel", and donating it to their local food bank.

Fuck no.

She's keeping that rock.
"She's either going to keep the diamond for a ring, or, if it's worth a lot, she'll want that for college."
You know, they say that God works in mysterious ways.  I don't get it.  God lets a 14-year-old murder his algebra teacher with a box cutter in Massachusetts.  Then, in the same week, he helps another 14-year-old find a diamond and pocket the money.


Look, I'm not upset that the kid found the diamond.  And, if she wants to keep it, good for her.

But, if you're going to credit someone for pointing it out to you, at least pretend to do something with the money that that person would have wanted.  There are so many horrible things happening in the world, I'm sure that helping a kid in the Ozarks find a diamond was not high on his To Do list.  And, if it was, I'm sure his reason for aiding in its discovery was not so that some teenage kid could put it in a ring.

Mysterious as fuck, if you ask me....

*Who in the hell vacations in Arkansas?  Could things get any more depressing?  The only time I "vacationed" in Arkansas, was to visit my grandmother while she was undergoing open heart surgery.  That's three weeks of my life I'll never get back.

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