Quote Of The Day

 “I think I've always been bisexual.  I mean, it’s something that I’ve always been interested in. I think everybody kind of fantasizes about the same sex. I think people are born bisexual, and it’s just that our parents and society kind of veer us off into this feeling of Oh, I can’t. They say it’s taboo. It’s ingrained in our heads that it’s bad, when it’s not bad at all. It’s a very beautiful thing.”

 - Green Day's  Billie Joe Armstrong, in a January 1995 interview with Advocate magazine.

It Has Been An Wonderful Two Years. Thank You.

Note:  Please forgive me.  I have a lot on my mind.  This may not be the most well written article, but it's the thought that counts, right?

Tomorrow will be the start of the third year of "The Twitch".  I started the blog as a way to vent my frustrations. It was a journal of sorts.  A hobby that didn't involve shooting zombies.

The following two years have been nothing short of amazing.  The more I wrote, the more I started to become a writer.  To look back at some of the dribble that was typed out in the early days is embarrassing.  Please don't read the archives.  LOL.  The entire theme of my website has changed over time.  Looking at my page today, you would have no idea that I started by discussing my issues with Tourette's and PTSD.

I have taken a more active role in politics.  I have also stepped up, and become somewhat of an activist on LGBT issues, especially those that effect the bisexual community.  I even came out on this page.  More than anything, this page has become an outlet for me to discuss my religious upbringing, and the consequences that followed because of it.  I don't know where my mind would be without having this outlet.

Since September 2009, some posts have been more popular than others.  Believe it or not, a story about "Zombie Boy" Rick Genest, the tattooed gentleman in Lady Gaga's 'Born This Way' video, is the most popular thus far.  Though the article was written in March of this year, it is responsible for almost 25% of all traffic to the website, since it's launch two years ago.  Six months after it's debut, it is still viewed six times for every click that the next most popular story receives each day.  Insane.

It was around that time that things really started to take off for "The Twitch".  In fact, 82% of my total site views have been since March 1st, and the page has 30 times the monthly views that it did at the beginning of the year.  This is no longer a hobby.  It is a profession.  I tell people that I am a blogger.

That's the reason why you may have noticed some changes to the page recently.  "The Daily Twitch", while a catchy title, was already taken as a URL.  Turns out, there is an advertising blog of the same name in Australia.  So, after 18+ months, it was time for a change.  "The Twitch Online" was born.  There may be a number of additional, minor changes coming soon in the way of layout.

I want to thank everyone for reading my page.  For getting a laugh every now and then.  For those that take time to comment.  Those who share my articles on Facebook and Twitter.

I would like to thank a few of the readers that have followed me early on (Those whose names I know, at least.)  Casey, Rachel and Melissa, thank you for sticking with me through some really shitty posts.  LOL.  To my subscribers, thank you for waking up with me.  Sometimes, I don't know what any of you see in this website, but it's nice to know that you see something worthwhile.

Here's to another fantastic year.

Check Out The Trailer For 'Three'

From Tom Tykwer, Director of Run, Lola, Run.



Talk about a bizarre love triangle.

And, what is it with that fucking song today?

Study: Bi Men Exist. Savage Offers Mea Culpa, Sort Of

Dr. Michael Bailey

Duh.

In a 2005 paper, Northwestern University professor Dr. Michael Bailey, essentially stated that bisexual men were, in fact, gay, but fooling themselves.  The research at the time entailed measuring the "level of sexual arousal" a participant was at while watching both gay and straight porn.  At the time of the 2005 study, the subjects only "responded" to the gay porn.

The study thereby concluded that male bisexuality did not exist.  Bailey reported:

"In men there's no hint that true bisexual arousal exists, and that for men arousal is orientation."

The New York Times went so far as to say that men are "Straight, Gay or Lying".  As you could imagine, the bi community was furious, but they had no scientific ammunition to counter Bailey's argument.

Fast forward six years.  A landmark study published Tuesday, confirms that bisexual men do indeed exist.  One of the study's authors is the very same Dr. Michael Bailey from the '05 paper.    And, it unequivocally nullifies the findings of research done in 2005.  Why the about face?

In a word:  science.  Or more precisely, the scientific method.

For the '05 study, men were sought out via ads in gay-themed, and alternative lifestyle magazines.  There was no real selection process.  They accepted all comers (no pun intended).  If a guy wanted to participate and said he was bisexual, regardless of their sexual history, he was accepted.

This time around, the application process was a little more stringent.  Not only did they advertise specifically on websites that catered to bisexual clientele, but the men that took part in the study were also required to have a history with both men and women.  Men had to have had two sexual experiences with members of each sex, and a relationship lasting at least three months with a member of each sex.  (So, that time that you made out with that chick at the frat party in college didn't count.)  I wouldn't have even been considered "bisexual enough" to be part of this study.

So to make the study scientifically sound, the tests were conducted in the same fashion as they were in 2005.  Electrodes were placed around the subject's penises.  They were shown pornographic videos with only men, then only women.  As the videos were being shown, the electrodes measured the "level of sexual arousal" the subject was feeling at the time.  Turns out, the results were exactly the opposite of what they found in 2005.  The results of the study showed that while bisexual men responded to both the male and female videos, gay and straight men did not.  Quoting the study:

"On average, the bisexual men in our sample had distinctly bisexual patterns of both genital and subjective arousal.... It appears that some men may identify as bisexual because they are sexually aroused by both sexes, even if they experience considerably more arousal to one sex than the other. Alternatively, men with bisexual arousal patterns may experience temporal fluctuations in their attractions and arousal to men and to women. Thus, a bisexual man may be more aroused by male stimuli at one time point but by female stimuli at another time point. Further, his arousal to his less arousing sex may vary in magnitude depending on fluctuations in his attractions to that sex at any given time.

The current study establishes that some bisexual men have bisexual arousal patterns. Accepting the centrality of sexual arousal patterns in understanding male sexual orientation (Bailey, 2009), this suggests that indeed, some men have a bisexual orientation."

 The study even received the attention of notorious biphobe Dan Savage, who wrote about it last week before the paper was published.(I didn't catch the article until today, since I try to intentionally avoid anything related to him.)  While it was refreshing to finally see a blog post from Savage titled "Case Closed: Bisexuals Exist", it is disappointing to not see an apology for years of disparaging comments aimed at the bisexual community.  While in a round about way, he did admit that he was wrong about bisexuals.  Though, he said:

"How's this for irony: once researchers controlled for the young-and-temporarily-bi-identified and the gay-and-kidding-themselves-about-being-bi—once researchers refused to accept without question the professed sexual identities of the bi-identified men they recruited, once researchers acted like biphobes and bigots—they were able to demonstrate that "bisexual arousal patterns" actually exist"

Lovely, isn't he?  Justifying his bigotry?  Ladies and gentlemen, may I present, everything that's wrong with the gay community.   Yes, Dan Savage is a despicable human being in my opinion.  But, he is a little less despicable today than what he was the day before.  As arrogant as he is, he can at least be humble; or be as humble as Dan Savage is capable of being.  He said this regarding the study.  I would like to think applies to Savage as well:

"But here's the lovely thing about science: what science gets wrong, more science sets right."

 You would think that bisexual advocacy organizations across the country would be ecstatic that this study was revisited, let alone the results.  They're not.  In fact, most groups, particularly the Bisexual Resource Center, Bi Social Network and the Bisexual Organizing Project are skeptical of the science that actually validates their existence.

They are disconcerted, most notably for two reasons: that women were not included in the study, and that the "least common denominators (porn and erections) were used as indicators to measure sexual attraction.

What many fail to understand is that Tuesday's study is a revisit of the 2005 research.  As such, the scientific method dictates that test subjects must come from a similar demographic, but the conditions of the research must be identical as they were in 2005.  Otherwise, if research conditions had changed in any way, and the outcome was different than what it was in '05, skeptics could reasonably say that the research was flawed.

Also, when you think about it, measuring erectile response is the most practical way to gauge sexual attraction   in males.  They say that when you see someone that you're attracted to, your pupils dilate, but I'm sure this is much more reliable.  Any other way would be subjective.  They can't show someone a picture of a man and say, "Do you find this person attractive", and take the subject's word for it.  That isn't scientific.  Sometimes science isn't pretty, or prude for that matter.

A study like this is much better suited toward males than females.  Physically, it is much easier to measure sexual stimulation/arousal in men than woman.  I imagine it's also much less intrusive and awkward.  Sex is much different for men than women.  To put it bluntly, if a guy gets turned on, he gets hard.  End of story.  There are many more processes involved when it comes to female sexuality.  And yes, I intentionally used the word process.  That's what it is.  It's a science in itself.  A man can go from flaccid, to hard, to finished in thirty seconds.  We're apes.  We make the perfect test subjects.

The bi community should stop whining and take this for what it is, a victory.  For once we have scientific proof of something we have known our entire lives.  We're real.  We exist.  We are no longer the mythical unicorns of legend.  If Dan Savage says so, it has to be true, right?

Ran Into An Ex-Girlfriend Yesterday...

Or, at least I thought she was my girlfriend when I was in high school.  Her name was Teresa.  We worked together at Bank of America during my senior year.  She was also a Jehovah's Witness.

I thought I was head over heels in love with this girl.  I would give her rides home, sometimes take her mom to run an errand.  I even would spend my weekends at her congregation's conventions throughout the year, just to bump into her.  Looking back, I was in the "friends zone" from the moment I met her.  Who could blame her, really.  I was socially awkward.  I weighed at least 40 lbs. more then than I do now.  I had horrific acne.  For Christ's sake, I had a perm.  I looked like Ryan Reynolds in 'Just Friends'...

This IS Ryan Reynolds.  This is not a picture of me at 17.

When I found out she was dating another guy, I was devastated.  I was too naive to realize in the months before that there was absolutely nothing going on between us.  The last time I communicated with her, I sent her two dozen roses, and cut the flowers off of the stems.  I know.  It was a dick move.  A little crazy at the time, too.  I may have also sent her a bunch of commemorative plates in the mail.  LOL.  I went to the library's magazine section and clipped out every commemorative plate and music club offer they had.  I then put her name and address on the forms and mailed them all.  Goddammit, I was an asshole.

My daughter and I were walking through the mall yesterday, and stopped by the Disney Store.  We're looking at Rapunzel dolls, and an employee walks up to me to offer me a bag.  It was Teresa.  I asked her, "I know this sounds weird, but is your name Teresa?"

I told her who I was, and she didn't recognize my name.  Must have made one hell of an impression, huh?  She asked me how I knew her, and I told her that we worked together as teenagers.  Asked her how her mom and sister were doing.  She realized by the fact that I asked about her family that I used to be a Witness.  She never introduced any of her "worldly" friends to her JW family.

I introduced her to my little girl and told her a little about what's been happening in my life lately.  She has three kids now.  They were sitting on the bench in the mall outside the store.  She had to step away to help another customer.

I have no idea whether she's still a Witness or not.  She asked me if I was still practicing.  I laughed.  Told her that I haven't been in since I was 21.  Also told her that I have an ex-JW blog and that my wife and I were activists for the LGBT community.  Needless to say, she didn't ask any more questions at that point.  Thankfully, I don't even "look" like a Witness anymore.  I've grown a beard.  I have numerous visable tattoos (one of which takes up my left forearm), and my ears are stretched.  I'm a little surprised that she asked.

I've thought a lot about Teresa in the last 24 hours.  I've been wondering "what if".  What if things worked out between us?  What if those were my kids sitting outside of that store?  What if I had tried harder to stay in the church?

Realistically, if any of those scenarios found some way to have worked themselves out, my life would have been miserable.  She wouldn't have understood, or accepted, my sexual orientation.  In fact, I have changed so much about myself in the last ten years, that she wouldn't have even been a remotely compatible match for me.  There is no doubt that we would have broken up.  I would have even suffered through the trauma of a divorce to get out of the Witness organization, if it was necessary to do so.  

It makes me realize how considerably lucky I am.  I have a beautiful, intelligent wife that accepts me for who I am....no reservations.  She made me able to truly be myself for the first time in my life.  I'm a stronger person because of her.  I'm not cowering in the corner any longer.  I'm a better person because of her.  

I used to pray that I would do anything if God just made Teresa mine.  Thankfully, those prayers fell on deaf ears.

NAACP Holds Town Hall On LGBT Issues, Forgets To Invite Anyone B Or T

As part of NAACP's 102nd convention on Monday, the organization held a town hall discussion on LGBT issues within the African American community.  The town hall was hosted by out CNN anchor Don Lemon.  The panel included lesbian comedienne Wanda Sykes, professor Beverly Guy-Sheftall of Spelman College, actor Darryl Stephens from 'Noah's Ark' and writer/activist Kenyon Farrow.  The panel also included former director of the NAACP, Julian Bond.

Look at the panel in the above picture.  This was supposedly a discussion on "LGBT issues", yet at the table there is a lesbian, two gay men, another lesbian, a straight guy and a third gay man.  Notice anything missing?  Not one bisexual or transgendered individual was on stage.  Let's just call this what it was then, shall we?  A town hall to discuss gay and lesbian issues.

'The Advocate' brought the subject to light on their website Sunday.  While, at first, I was going to praise the magazine for bringing this to people's attention, upon further reading, the article simply added insult to injury.  The article was titled 'Trans Activists Criticize NAACP'.  Immediately, by the title of the piece, it painted the picture that transgendered activists have found something new to whine about, not that the NAACP actually did anything wrong.  The article goes on to quote trans activist and blogger, Monica Roberts, as writing on her blog, TransGriot:

"Not sure how the bi portion of our community feels about it, but I can say with certainty that the trans part of the rainbow community is not happy about the erasure of African descended trans people from this historic panel.  NAACP, if your goal is to have a serious discussion of the issues that face African American LGBT people, then you can't erase the people who are taking the brunt of the casualties and discrimination."

The one problem with the quote, was that it was initially credited to Stephanie Stevens, another trans activist altogether.  After complaints came in to 'The Advocate' from both Roberts and Stevens, the article was eventually changed to reflect the correct blogger.  By then, the damage had already been done.

This is just the most recent incident in a long line of scenarios where the bisexual and transgendered population has been the victims of ignorance, or invisibility and erasure at the hands of the rest of the queer community.  In an environment where 70% of LGBT hate crime victims are minorities, and 44% of victims are transgender women, having someone on the panel that could actually speak of that issue, firsthand, should have been a given.

Speaking as a bisexual man, I see time after time when my sexuality is discredited and discounted by the most vocal members of the gay community.  For example, 'It Gets Better' creator and media darling, Dan Savage, has published numerous blog posts that, at the very least, could be considered bi-phobic.  What he preaches about bisexuals is demeaning, insulting and....well, let Dan explain his position on the topic.  ***LANGUAGE IS VERY NSFW AT AROUND THE 2:00 MARK***



So, just as a recap, bisexuality is a "phase" and a "choice".  I guess, according to Savage, gays and lesbians are "Born This Way", but bisexuals choose their sexual orientation.  As for myself, I'm 36 years old, and my "bi phase" has lasted 25 years now.  I didn't "choose" to be bisexual.  Believe me.  As an American male, it would have been so much easier growing up straight or gay, than growing up bi.  I have faced ridicule from both sides of the aisle.  For most of my ex-girlfriends, I was too gay for them.  For most men, I was too straight.  Yes, I am in an opposite sex relationship now.  I have been with my wife six years in September.  Though I have been faithful to her, men turn me on too.  They always have.  Just because I happen to be in a relationship with a woman, doesn't mean that I'm any less bisexual than what I was six years ago.  If nothing else, I probably find myself more attracted to men now than what I have been my entire life.

Does my attraction to men mean that I am not able to sustain a loving, healthy relationship with a woman?  Does my attraction to women mean that I am not a suitable candidate for a long term relationship with another man?  Does that mean that the bisexual citizens of New York that married their same sex partners this week have made a terrible mistake?  According to Dan Savage it does:

"Sorry, but avoiding bi guys is a good rule of thumb for gay men looking for long-term relationships. Outside of San Francisco's alternate-universe bisexual community, there aren't many bi guys who want or wind up in long-term, same-sex relationships -- monogamous or not. 

Judging from my mail, when a gay guy or a straight girl gets involved with a bi guy, someone always winds up getting hurt. And guess what? It's rarely the bi guy.  

There are definitely some people who should fool around with bisexual men: OTHER BISEXUAL MEN! Jesus Christ, bisexuals -- if straights and gays treat you unfairly, then why not turn to each other for love and comfort? Judging from my mail of late, there's an unlimited supply of easily offended, extremely verbose, highly ethical bisexuals out there looking for love. Fuck each other!"

Lovely, isn't it?

There were plenty of representatives of the bisexual and transgendered community that could have been invited to be part of the NAACP's panel.  Adrienne Williams, founder of Bi Social Network, has been a proven leader in the bi community, building bridges with not only the gay and lesbian community, but straight allies nationwide.  In June, she was honored at the White House's LGBT Pride reception.

Regina Wells is the founder of This Is H.O.W., a non profit organization dedicated to improving the lives of trans persons here in the Phoenix area.  Founded in 2006, TIH provides counseling, drug and alcohol rehabilitation services and shelter for trans individuals that are at risk or in danger.  She was Echo Magazine's Woman of the Year in 2007.

These women know first hand the struggles that minorities in the bisexual and transgendered community face.  Their years of experience make them experts in their field.  Why then, were they not invited?  What excuse can the NAACP give?

You know, last month, Dan Savage presented a challenge to those in the bi community.  In my mind, the words ring true for our trans brothers and sisters.  He said,

"I'm sorry, bisexual activists, but you're doing it all wrong. Instead of berating me for my alleged bi-phobia—and if I'm the enemy, you're in real trouble—berate your closeted compatriots. If they all came out tomorrow, you could put an end to bi-phobia, take over the LGBT movement, and kick my ass out of it."

I say we take him up on his offer.  The LGBT community should be just that:  a community.   We have all been through the same prejudices in life.  We have all been victims of discrimination.  We all want equal rights.    What many in the "community" fail to understand is that gay rights are bisexual rights, just as they are trans rights.  We are all connected, whether we want to admit it or not.  Together, as a community, we are stronger.  You would think that those in the LGBT community would want as many voices as they could get.  Maybe it's time that some of us became more vocal.

My Reaction To Last Week's "Very Special Bi-Phobic" Episode Of 'Glee'

First of all, I apologize for posting this a little late.  I know that Glee came on Tuesday night, and it's now the following Monday.  I haven't been feeling well all week, and unfortunately, the Tumblr page has suffered.  That being said, moving on.....

When I read the rumor on After Elton that a "bisexual encounter" was going to be featured on an upcoming episode with a male character on 'Glee', I couldn't have been happier.  To think of the possibilities!  "Just imagine what the show could do for the bisexual community", I thought.  

After all, think about how much it has done for gay teens in the last year or so.  'Glee' has brought issues like anti-gay bullying to the forefront.  Gay teens have someone to look up to.  They have a role model.  His name is Kurt Hummel.  He's going through the same issues they are in school.  He feels alone.  He feels misunderstood, and, to make it worse, there's a guy on the football team that won't stop harassing him.

And now, with the second season, Kurt has a role model in Blaine Anderson.  He's doesn't show any signs of insecurity.  He's charismatic, cute, and charming as all hell.  And, as another role model to gay youth on television, is very secure in his sexual orientation.

So, I'm reading this article, and I'm thinking, "Who's it going to be?  Is it going to be Finn?  He's really lightened up in the last few episodes about his homophobia.  Maybe it's Sam.  You know, the rumor was going around at the beginning of the season that he was going to play a gay character.  When he first showed up on the show, the other characters thought he was gay.....so?  Or...best scenario.  You know Karofsky?  The football player that was bullying Kurt earlier this season?  What if he is bisexual?  Wouldn't that be great if he ended up coming out?" (OK...It's a little obvious that I follow the show closely.)

So, about a week later, another article came out on After Elton, stating that the "bisexual encounter" in question would be happening to none other than...Blaine.  FUCK!  I immediately knew that there was no way at all for this to end positively for the bisexual community.  It was much worse than I could have ever thought.

OK. Let's explain the scenario:  Rachel is having a party.  Everyone gets drunk, except Finn and Kurt.  They play "Spin the Bottle".  Rachel spins.  Bottle lands on Blaine.  They kiss.  Kiss becomes extended kiss.  Hint of some type of "spark".

The next day, Rachel works up the courage to call Blaine up and ask him out.  Blaine receives the call while having coffee with Kurt at a coffee shop.  The following conversation ensues:

Whoa..Whoa..WHOA!!  EXCUSE ME?!?!  "It felt good because you were drunk"?  "Bisexual is a term that gay guys in high school use when they wanna hold hands with girls and feel like a normal person for a change"?  My disgust was beyond words.


I must say, that although somewhat weak, it was nice to see some defense from the "accused" bisexual.  Unfortunately, this was the only discussion on the matter from Blaine until the end of the episode.  Kurt and Rachel make, for the lack of a better term, a bet, as to whether Blaine is gay or bi.


At the end of the episode, Rachel sneaks up on Blaine, and kisses him.  His reaction is along the lines of "Yep...I'm Gay."


So, by the end of the episode, the show that has supposedly been monumental in being influential and supportive to the young LGBT community, has taught us what?  It's taught us that 1. Bisexuals are "confused".  2. Bisexuality is a passing phase, and finally,  3. Bisexuality is encouraged, or brought on by alcohol.  And, to make things a hundred times worse, the name of the episode is "Blame It On The Alcohol".


The gay blogs had a fucking field day with this on Wednesday morning.  Of the three that I personally read that had a post regarding the episode, a total of 3 comments between them mentioned bi-phobia.  More than a third of the comments were upset at the way Kurt snapped at his dad after his dad found Blaine in Kurt's bed.  About another third were upset with how gays were portrayed as being "two drinks away from making out with a girl".  "But," as one commenter said, "that's how gay teenagers are these days."  The bi-phobia's so thick you can almost taste it.


My first same sex crush was George Michael.  I saw a music video of his when I was about 9 years old and instantly got butterflies.  At the time, I also had a crush on a red haired girl in my class.  That's confusing.  By the time I was 11, I was regularly attracted to people of both sexes.


In high school, I had my parents and my church convincing my I was straight.  During the day, I had guys at school calling me "faggot", because I didn't fit in to their mold.  As I got older, my gay and lesbian friends kept telling me, "Just come out of the closet already.  You're gay, man."


My point is, life is confusing enough.  We already have too many outside influences trying to shove us in one direction or another.  The last thing we need as bisexuals (especially male bisexuals), is a television show spewing bi-phobic propaganda.  It does nothing but keep bis in the closet, and gives people the assumption that their bi-phobic theories are correct.


From what I've read, starting with next week's episode, Brittany and Santana are supposed to enter into a long term bisexual relationship.  Based upon 'Glee's' previous assumptions that you either have to be "confused" or "drunk" to be bi, it's going to make for an interesting season.  Then again, I guess Brittany could be the confused one, if they can find a way to make Santana an alcoholic.  Wait, didn't I hear somewhere that "all bi girls are sluts"?


That's it.  That's the angle they'll take.

A Preview Of Tonight's "Very Bisexual" 'Glee'

By now, I'm sure many of you have heard that tonight is the big episode where Blaine questions whether he's gay or not.  I'm not really positive as to what makes him doubt his sexuality, but from the preview of tonight's episode, it looks like it involves alcohol and playing spin the bottle with Rachel Berry.  Sorry for the poor video quality:



You would think, as a bi male, I would be thrilled.  Well, I'm not.  And it's for one simple reason:  There is no way this can turn out positive for the gay or the bi community.  Let me explain.

When 'Glee' came onto the scene last season, we were introduced to Kurt Hummel.  Almost instantly, he became a role model and an idol for young gay youth around the world.  Then, in season two, Blaine came into the picture.  Not only did he become a role model for young gay men, but a role model for Kurt Hummel.  He was confident in his sexuality.  He was proud to be a gay man.

For the sake of all of the people that look up to his character for inspiration, you cannot have him doubt his sexuality.  Besides, in real life, this doesn't happen.  Someone that has known since an early age that they were gay does not suddenly have second thoughts that they might be gay one night.  That's not reality.  'Glee is lying to kids, and kids will believe it with all of their hearts.

This is the same reason I didn't like 'The Kids Are Alright'.  The main lesbian couple were together for 20+ years, and Julianne Moore's character suddenly decides she needs to start having an affair with a guy?  That doesn't happen.  I can tell you from my experience in the community, that that is Hollywood and not human sexuality.  But, people will watch that movie, and walk out of the movie theater thinking that that's what lesbians do from time to time.  It's ridiculous.

There is no possible way for tonight's 'Glee' episode to end positively for the gay community.  And, there is no positive way for it to end positively for the bi community either.  By the end of the episode, the writers will likely make it look like his bisexual thinking was just a "phase".  After all, male bisexuals don't exist, or at least, that's what we're made to believe.  We're "confused", or "gay and just don't know it yet".  They're going to play on the "confused" angle, I bet, and then, have everything cleared up nicely and have him gay again within the hour.

American primetime television needs bi male characters.  If 'Glee' was truly interested in having a genuine bi character on the show, they would have made one of the straight guys bi.  Have Sam do a same sex kiss.  He was rumored to be gay when the season started, with his dyed blonde hair and all.  Or better (best) yet, have the bully Karofsky become bisexual.  He has already kissed Kurt.  He would be the perfect candidate.  Don't mess with the guys that are already gay.  When you do, you're playing with fire, and just showing the showing the world that this isn't genuine.  It's nothing but a publicity stunt.

Jehovah's Witnesses And Bisexuality

Growing up as a Jehovah's Witness, my first non-heterosexual memory had to be around age 9 or so.  I remember watching a George Michael video on television and thinking to myself, "He's really pretty".  As I got older, my interest in boys became stronger and more frequent.  From the age of 11 on, it was pretty much on the same level as my attraction to girls.

Being a Witness, I was told from an early age that homosexuality was wrong.  There was no mention in any of the publications about someone in my predicament.  At the time, I had never heard of the term "bisexuality" within the Jehovah's Witness organization.  It wasn't until years after leaving the church that I was able to come to terms with my sexuality.  In fact, I have only been "out" for a very short time.

My how things have changed.  In the December 2010, Awake!, there is a half page follow up article that asks, 'What About Bisexuality?'.  It is deplorable to see the misleading and misguided information that they are giving their impressionable young people within the congregation that are truly seeking answers.

They truthfully state that bisexuality is more common in girls.  Then they go on to state that the three main reasons that people are bisexual are "for attention, curiosity and attraction".  "Girls who lack self confidence will do almost anything to make a guy like them".  That is a direct quote from the article, folks.

So is this, "But what if you're really drawn to both sexes?  You should be aware that same sex attraction is nothing more than a passing phase." Really!!!  So, the last 24 years have only been a "passing phase" for me? How insulting.  I like how they provide no medical or scientific evidence to support their claims.  How about homosexuality in the animal world?  Penguins?  Hyenas?  Anyone?

My favorite part is a quote from a 16 year old girl named Lisette.  She says, "Talking to my parents about my feelings made me feel better.  Also, I learned that during the adolescent years, hormone levels can fluctuate greatly.  I truly think that if more youths knew more about their bodies, they would understand that same sex attraction can be temporary and they wouldn't feel the pressure to be gay."  I guarantee you she did not learn these things in her health class at school, but by her Witness parents.  I wasn't allowed to take Sex Ed in health class and no one in my congregation was either.  Our parents didn't want any "worldly" people teaching us how to have sex.  My mom did such a good job at teaching me the birds and the bees, I didn't recognize a vadge the first time I saw one.  But that's another story.

Point is, think of how many lost and confused LGBT kids there are in that mess right now, just like I was.  They're being told everything they are is a phase.  It's a lie.  It's heartbreaking.  These kids are being told to "trust in Jehovah", like god's going to magically make them straight and happy.

I just wish there was a way I could reach them.

I Came Out To My Mother Yesterday

Yesterday, my mother sent me an email, asking me if I could send her my address so she could send my daughter something.  For some reason, she doesn't understand that if ties are severed between her and I, they're severed for my family as well.  She seems to think that she'll be able to have a perfectly normal relationship with her granddaughter even if she's no longer talking to her son.  I don't understand how her mind works.

In the response to her email, I told her that, considering the bang up job she did parenting me, I wanted her nowhere near my daughter.  I also decided to get a number of things off of my chest.  I told her for the first time about my PTSD, and that it was caused by years of child abuse that I had endured.  Finally, I told her about my bisexuality.

Lastly, I'm bisexual.  I've known this since I was about 11 years old.  Growing up was pure hell in that house.  I had absolutely no one I could talk to.  I had no friends.  I couldn't even talk to my own mother.  Everyday I was getting my ass kicked, being called a fatass and a faggot.  I contemplated suicide on a daily basis for most of my teenage years.  And I knew that if I opened up about what I was going through, I would be bullied by my family too.  Growing up, I wanted to come to you and tell you about the crushes I had on just as many boys as I did girls.  It wasn't just Anne and Ambre.  You have no idea how alone I was, but I knew what the consequences were if I told you.

I'm not expecting a response.  I don't want to ever speak to her again.

Fascinating Quote By Green Day's Billy Joe Armstrong

From an interview in 1995 with The Advocate magazine:

"I think I've always been bisexual. I mean, it's something that I've always been interested in. I think people are born bisexual, and it's just that our parents and society kind of veer us off into this feeling of 'Oh, I can't.' They say it's taboo. It's ingrained in our heads that it's bad, when it's not bad at all. It's a very beautiful thing."

 

Happy Celebrate Bisexuality Day!!

Today is the 19th annual Celebrate Bisexuality Day.  It was started in 1999, by three bisexual rights activists.  The bisexual pride flag, above, was actually created a year earlier.  This year is also the 25th anniversary of the Bisexual Resource Center as well as the 20th anniversary of BiNet USA.

So, go out and celebrate.  Call your boyfriend and let them know, then call your girlfriend.

New Bisexual Ad From Ikea

The following is an ad that recently started running in Austria, from furniture behemoth, Ikea.  I liked it...thought it was cute.  So far today, I've seen the ad on three blogs, all calling it a "gay" ad.  People are already calling it anti-gay and saying that it is a commercial about a "closeted heterosexual".  I see it differently.




The main male character in the commercial is bi.  He is not a closeted heterosexual, nor is he gay.  Infidelity is infidelity regardless of sexual orientation, but to me, this commercial would be no different if it were the lady's husband that came home early.  Ikea was trying to be clever and original.  In that way, they succeeded. I am proud to be one of their customers.

It has always been a pet peeve of mine the way that bisexuals are portrayed in the media, and in the LGBT community itself.  People try to force us to choose a side.  We have to be either gay or straight.  If you're bi, and especially if you're a female, you're portrayed simply as a slut.  And when it comes to the male bisexual, you would think they don't exist.  They seem to have a mythical reputation.  Let me tell you, they exist.  I am one of them, and I am happy to see us represented in mainstream advertising.  It's about time.

Great Quote I Found On Bisexuality

Courtesy of Sex Is Not The Enemy: "Bisexual people quickly get used to the idea that almost no one will take their identity seriously… Maybe there are dudes out there who really would be willing to come out as bisexual for the cause, but because society would twist it into them coming out as gay, they’re just going to sit this one out until America has grown up enough to understand what words mean."