Somehow, we made it. Everyday, our love for each other stronger than the last. We have always been told that we have the perfect relationship...the type of marriage you only see in the movies. We've been together for a little over four years and have never had a fight. We very rarely, if ever, raise our voices around each other. She's into video games. I like to help her pick out clothes. It just works.
The song I am writing about tonight is "our song", 'Chasing Cars' by Snow Patrol. Had we had a "traditional" wedding, this would have been the first dance at our reception. Instead of marrying in Vegas as planned, we got married in our kitchen, the night after Thanksgiving, by our friend Lindsay, with two witnesses in attendance to sign the license. Instead of champagne and wedding cake, we each had a bowl of chocolate chip ice cream.
The song is very simple in it's writing style. It's not overly flowery or wordy. That, I think, is what I like about it. It gets to the point. The first verse describes us perfectly:
"We'll do it all
Everything
On our own
We don't need
Anything
Or anyone"
We have been through more drama in the four short years that we have been together, than some couples see in a lifetime. Six, count them, six moves, two of which were long distance. Not to mention the loss of my family. The stress associated with the loss of a job and the subsequent unemployment. Pregnancy and the birth of our baby girl. Then my medical/mental issues came to the forefront. We're now dealing with the consequences associated with that. A couple of months ago we lost the family van. Last Friday, I received the last paycheck from my employer that I'll ever get. My career is over. I am expecting a decision from MetLife within the next 24-48 hours with a decision as to whether my long term disability has been approved. Since I can no longer care for myself, we're discussing the possibility of having my wife quit her job to become a caretaker of sorts. So, her career is so to end as well.
My favorite line from the song is one that has been edited out of the U.S. single and radio versions heard here in the States. It says, "I need your grace to remind me to find my own". Just being in my wife's presence makes me a better person. She makes me want to be a better human being. I am who I am today because of her. I wouldn't care about anyone in this world other than myself if it wasn't for trying to copy her selfless attitude, and I don't thank her enough for that. She is the greatest "human" I have ever personally had the pleasure of knowing, and I'm so happy I have her here to instill her values and morals in my daughter and keep me in check as well. I love you Jessi...I knew it from the moment I first saw your eyes.
It took me forever to find the U.K. version of the song. It includes the extra line. Enjoy.
Here is a pic of the two of us from a much less stressful time. It was taken in a photo booth at the 2007 New Mexico State Fair just weeks before we were married. We were a little more punk then and a little less crazy. The pic is currently on our refrigerator. I still smile every time I get the milk.
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