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Wednesday, September 28, 2011

Would You Like A Side Of Diabetes With That?

When you hear the words "Popeye's Chicken", I'm sure the first things that come to mind are healthy, nutritional meals, right?  Of course, I'm being sarcastic.  It's impossible to consider anything fried as "healthy", but hey, at least they weren't the ones to come up with the Double Down.

Fuck bread.  Bread is for losers.  "Loser" is a clinical term for someone with  less than 42% body fat.
Chicken McNuggets have been around for 28 years.  They have, for the most part, kept the same shape since day one.  Popeye's has introduced a new line of chicken nuggets called "Dip'n Chick'n", that promises to be "McNuggets 2.0".  What makes them so different?  They're shaped like scoops.

From Popeye's website:
"Why has nobody come up with a way to serve chicken so you can really scoop up the dipping sauce?  Never mind.  We figured that one out ourselves.  Say bonjour to our one-of-a-kind Popeye's Dip'n Chick'n.  We cut premium breast fillets into the perfect chicken dippers and fry them up fresh."
I have a couple of issues with the product.  First, regardless of how chicken breast is cut, it does not naturally curl up when fried like a shrimp.  Nor does it resemble a Fritos Scoop.  Secondly, when a restaurant intentionally abbreviates the name of the animal used in the product name, it usually means that they aren't just trying to be clever.  They're not actually cooking said animal.  For example, krab salad, with imitation crab meat.

Though it may have been a clever marketing decision to make scoop shaped chicken nuggets, this decision wasn't really in the best interest of their customers.  If you think about it, the possibilities with this product are endless.  It doesn't end with dipping sauces.  Gravy, Cheez Whiz, Hormel chili...I could go on for days for recipies to lead to your next triple bypass.

Only in America.